Friday, March 21, 2014

what am i running from?

If you grew up in church, or even just in the South, you know the story of Jonah and the big fish.  All I remember is Jonah being swallowed but by a giant fish and living in his belly for a while before getting out.  Until recently, I had thought he fell off the ship.  I guess they soften things for kids, because he was actually thrown off...because he asked to be.  Yep, cast overboard of his own decision.

[caption id="attachment_495" align="aligncenter" width="205"]Doesn't this look sweet? Doesn't this look sweet?[/caption]

Why?  Let's go back to the beginning.  Jonah was commanded by God to go to Nineveh and preach, but guess what?  Jonah didn't want to do that.  Nope.  He ran away from God!  What was he thinking?  Can you actually do that?  Instead of going to Nineveh(Middle East), he jumped on a ship heading the opposite direction to Tarshish(present day Spain).

[caption id="attachment_496" align="aligncenter" width="300"]jonah_map click for source[/caption]

Then, a giant storm came and Jonah asked to be "cast off" because he knew that this raging storm had come.  The rest is history, he was swallowed by a fish and then later spat out after promising he would make good on what was asked of him.

So this got me thinking.  God is not just going to let me just run away.  No.  He is going to pursue me with his relentless, passionate, absolutely overwhelming love.  (Who doesn't want to be pursued??)

I self-sabotage.  I think I know what is the right thing for me.  I try to control my life.  What a crazy thought.  What have I been running from?  Where have I been afraid to go that I was being called?

There are things I have put off and put off.  I have, in my humanness, avoided what I knew I should or should not be doing.  Honestly, I just didn't trust that I was capable of what he was asking of me.  So, maybe all that struggle, all that heartache, all the trying to control was me in the belly of the fish.  God was waiting for me to surface, waiting for me to let go,  waiting for me to give in and do what he has put me here to do.

What have you run from?

How did God bring you back to where he wants you?

running from

9 comments:

  1. This is great, Niki! It's so exciting to see how God is working in your life!

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  2. I am a self sabatoger as well! I always look to God for guidance in everything I do. I grew up in church in the south so God is a special part of my life.

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  3. fitnessmomwinecountryMarch 21, 2014 at 11:20 AM

    Oh Niki..I could go on forever about this one. So many times God has brought me back, I can't even count. He is always right there and knows exactly where I need to be and what I can handle. I am not sure if I am running from anything at this point in my life currently, but maybe something small that I have not really targeted yet. Great post, thank you xoxox

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  4. We should all take the time to see what we are running from! Thanks!

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  5. Isn't it a restful thought?! Thank you, as always, for your kind words.

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  6. Thank you Susan! You have been a huge part of that! :)

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  7. whew! thought provoking -- great post!

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  8. […] sweat out all of my frustrations of the day.4. What is your favorite post that you’ve written? what am i running from? was really an eye-opener for me.  I feel like the gates just opened and I could see where and why […]

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